Nikki Lake" ^^;;
by Nikhya
Summary: Nikki, Duo, and Noin are on the set of Nikki's very short-lived talk show... No, it's not called 'Nikki Lake' but..well..I couldn't think of any other title. ^^;; A little profanity..not much though. That's the only reason it's 'R'.


  
Contains heavy opinions! ^_^ If you don't like opinions, don't read. Nikki drags Noin and Duo into her short-lived 'talk show?'?? ^^;; Anyway, it has to do with the latest mstie's and flames. Please enjoy, and review if you'd like. ^^  
  
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Nikki Lake? ^^;;;  
  
*camera pans down to three young sitting individuals upon a stage*  
  
Nikki: *smiles* Hello peoplez!  
  
Noin: *sweatdrop* Was that really the appropriate way to greet our viewers?  
  
Nikki: *sweatdrop* *still smiling* ..........  
  
Duo: Um, please forgive her folks, she's kind of perturbed right now...  
  
Nikki: *twitches* *gets up out of her chair and starts waving her arm around in the air* You bet your ass I am!!!  
  
Noin: *sighs* Let's try this again... *smiles* Hello fellow viewers! I'm Ms. Lucrezia Noin and this is my fellow cast member on the set of Gundam Wing, Duo Maxwell. And this.. *points at a now calm and sitting nikki*...Is Ms. Nikki. All three of us will be talking about the subject of fanfictions!   
  
Duo: *smiles* What about fanfictions exactly, you ask? Well, just about anything! In fact, you viewers at home have the choice of calling in and asking us about certain fanfic FAQ's! *beams*   
  
Nikki: *points at the numbers on the screen as they blink* Right here folks! Call in if you like! *1-800-weredesperate  
  
Noin: Is that even a legal amount of numbers?   
  
Duo: Better not get her started again...  
  
Noin: Good point... Never mind Nikki! Anyway, we would just like to thank Ms. Nikki for having us on her one-episode show! We were very honored to tear ourselves away from our present day jobs just to be her devilish minions of evil for an exact hour and 2 minutes!!  
  
Nikki: Hey! You actually READ your contracts?  
  
Duo: *looks over at Noin* We had contracts? I don't remember signing...  
  
Noin: *mutters* Don't worry, I read all the formalities...and signed for you.   
  
Duo: *looks over at a evilly smiling Nikki* Uhh..*sweatdrop* You SURE you read ALL of the formalities?  
  
Nikki: *interrupts* OKAYYY!! Now, for the calls!   
  
*silence*  
  
Nikki: Yep! Any minute now we should get hundreds of calls just POURING right into our studio!!  
  
*silence*  
  
Nikki: DAMN it! Why can't you people just pick up the friggin phone! I mean it's not like we're asking you for donations...although that would be nice tooo...hmm...  
  
Duo: What Nikki MEANT to say was that we'll give you a free 'ME' plush toy if you call!! *turns chibi*  
  
*phones start ringing off the hook*  
  
Nikki: *smiles*  
  
Duo: *turns back to normal* Hee!!  
  
Noin: *sweatdrop* How does he do that?!  
  
Nikki: Okay, now for our first caller!  
  
Anonymous caller: Umm, Hi Duo, Noin, Nikki... I was just wondering, what exactly is a 'flame'.  
  
Nikki: Well, dear Anonymous, what a flame is...*cracks her knuckles* What a flame is a terrible little comment or gesture someone makes about someone else's fanfiction! It usually contains quite mean and careless words and phrases, such as "Go screw yourself, your story stunk" or "WHY don't you TAKE this frieking piece of crap fic and SHOVE IT UP YOUR A-*cut off by Duo*  
  
Duo: *muffles Nikki's words* ^_^;; Again, let me translate for Ms. Nikki... What she meant to say was that flames tend to be rude and mean comments directed at someone else's fanfiction.  
  
Anonymous caller: But why do they use such a comment? Can't they just be kind and say "I don't like it" OR maybe even give advice to the reader in a review instead of just being all out negative instead?  
  
Duo: *lets Nikki go*   
  
Nikki: *brushes herself off* Well, you see Anonymous, some people don't know how to get their pea of a brain to work properly...either that, or their mouth is so full of crap after finally pulling their head out of their ass to do the review, that they can spew nothing but SHIT!  
  
Duo: *stands up and looks around* Censors, Censors!!!  
  
Nikki: Oh sit down Duo, it's rated 'R' for my language! Don't worry, everyone has been warned.  
  
Duo: *pouts* Still....  
  
Nikki: Anyway, Anonymous. I'll try to put this nicely, because technically I am being mean to flamers when I say those vulgar things. Flamers are people who don't know how to 'nicely' put words into their review...They don't understand (or they do) that it hurts a fanfictioner's feelings when they leave a flame. I'm glad to see that there aren't many flamers up on fanfiction.net. Most of these people know how to politely tell someone that their fanfiction wasn't all that great. But still, there are those few...In fact, this little interview may get a few flames itself.   
  
Anonymous caller: So, what you're saying is, a flame is just a result of bad judgment?  
  
Noin: No, no, I don't believe that's what Nikki and Duo were trying to say. It's not necessarily a result of bad judgment about the fic...bad choice of words, yes, but judgment? The story very well may be bad! In fact, it may be terrible...but that doesn't give anyone the right to hurt another person's feelings.   
  
Anonymous caller: I suppose people would use that saying where 'everyone has the freedom to say what they wish' right?  
  
Noin: Well, I suppose they can use that, yes. Flamers do have a right to say what they wish. Just as anyone else does. But there is a thing that exists...it's called 'ethics'. Ethics is about having decency...  
  
Nikki: Yeah, like for example, having the decency not to leave a mean comment when you read a story about two hot sweaty men using peanut butter for a nice little lubricant!! Not to mention throwing a in a bottle of honey for good measure...and it ended up, in fact, being a really terrible yaoi fic.  
  
Duo: Geez, where have you let your mind run?!  
  
Nikki: Hey, it's not my fault! Blame the pervs I have for friends!  
  
Noin: *sweatdrop* Yes, in fact...I'm sorry to say that it was a nice little example. Which brings another thing up...if you see a warning about *yaoi* or *yuri* or if it says *caution: SEX or CUSS WORDS* , then, it's your own fault if you went in and saw something you shouldn't have...Don't flame the author for writing about something you don't believe in. You don't go around yelling at people on the street just because they like the color blue and you happen to hate any bluish hue that pops in front of your eyes, do you?  
I'm sorry, that was a bit of a weak example...   
  
Nikki: Here, lemme try Noin... People, you don't go around breaking people's legs with a baseball bat just because they like soccer more than 'YOUR' sport, do you? Why can't we all just play pool, hm? *puppy dog eyes*  
  
Duo: Um...maybe we should stick to Noin's 'blue hue' thing...  
  
Nikki: *grrrrr*   
  
Anonymous caller: Well, thanks guys. I'm really glad that I called. I'll remember to be thoughtful when reviewing a fic. Now, do I get a real Duo plush toy?  
  
Nikki: No kid, now hang up the phone before your mother tans your hide for calling a 1-900 number!!  
  
Duo: Umm, Nikki... this is a 1-800 number...  
  
Nikki: *smiles* Oh! In that case, sure kid! Stay on the line and one of our FINE operators will be with you shortly to send you a kawaii little Duo doll!!  
  
*camera pans over to Heero who is answering phones*  
  
Nikki: Hehehe...TOLD You he was a FINE operator. *winks*  
  
Duo: Oh no, Heero. She got YOU into this too? Relena's gonna freak...  
  
Nikki: Oh, don't worry. Relena is tied up in the back room...Wufei is watching over her for me.  
  
Noin: *sweatdrop*  
  
Duo: WELL, lets take another call!! It looks like we only have time for two more...so lets make them good!  
  
Heero: *rushes off to the back rooms after putting another person on the line*  
  
Duo: *sweatdrop* Uh..hehe..  
  
Caller: Hi, my name is Holly!  
  
Duo/Noin/Nikki: Hello Holly!   
  
Holly: I just wanted to ask...what are the 'rules' when you 'Mstie' a fic...and what exactly IS a mstie?  
  
Nikki: Ha! I know everything there is to know about Mst3k! which stands for (Mystery science theater 3000), so I'm going to answer your question to the best of my abilities! *takes a big breath* First of all, Mst3k is a show where two robots and a human were shot into space and forced to watch bad movies by an evil man (crazy) Dr. Forrester. To survive the movies, they make fun of them... or in other words, they heckle them to no end.. It's quite hilarious, and I would go into a shameless plug mode for them, but we don't have time for that...Anyway, people writing fanfics got a great idea! Maybe they should 'mstie' fanfics too!!! BAD fanfics to be more specific. Which means, they make fun of another person's fic. (just as the real mst3k cast makes fun of movies...see the connection now?) Some people do a very good job of it. Others...well... they're okay. I've never seen a 'bad' mstie of a fic... Still, not all of them are hilarious...  
  
Holly: How exactly do you mstie a fic?   
  
Nikki: Well, what exactly do you mean, 'how'?  
  
Holly: I mean, how do you get the permission? You can't just TAKE the fics can you? Isn't that kind of like...illegal or something?  
  
Nikki: Technically, you CAN'T take another person's fic...not without permission. Of course, you can't exactly sue either...so it kind of makes stealing quite easy. That's where 'ethics' comes in again. Some people have it, and some people don't. You can't really do anything about that.. BUT, on the real show mst3k, they don't have it so easy. They HAVE to get permission from the movie maker or director in order to use the movie without doing something illegal. Otherwise, they COULD get sued. Once they agree to having their 'bad' movie used by mst3k, mst3k can pretty much say anything they want about the movie.(PRETTY much anything)   
  
Holly: So then, someone CAN take the fic without asking...  
  
Nikki: Yes, you can. But again, it's not write, it's not ethical, and most of all...It's very rude! If you want to mstie something and you can't find a bad fic, mstie your own fic if possible! I understand that your fic may not be 'BAD', but if it's not...then don't mstie anything until you can find someone that will LET you make fun of theirs! By the way, a fic doesn't necessarily have to be BAD to mstie it...but most people won't mstie a 'good' fic because the author is a good writer. Most of the recent mstie's I've seen so far have been kinda bashing on the author and not just the story itself...ANYway..  
  
Holly: But wait a sec, if you shouldn't take someone else's fic...then why can you mistie a Gundam wing episode without asking?   
  
Nikki: Well, as I said before, here is where 'ethics' comes in. It's nice that you'd like to ask the owner of Gundam Wing if you could use the episode or not...but you can't, (not unless you know the owner personally!), so instead, giving credit where it is due will probably be fine.  
  
Holly: But, then, why can't you just give credit to the fanfic creator instead of asking him/her for permission and be done with it?  
  
Duo: Here, lemme take over Nikki.. Once again, ethics works its way in. Holly, if you CAN get a hold of the writer, or if it's even POSSIBLE to get a hold of the writer, it's always nice to inform them of your need of their 'bad' fic BEFORE you use it.   
  
Noin: Usually, wherever you found the fic, you'll find the author's e-mail address OR you can find the site owner's e-mail address and go through him/her. Sure, it seems like a whole bunch of work, and to some degree it is a lot of work, but it's worth it.   
  
Nikki: It's just plain NOT nice/decent to just TAKE someone else's hard work and put it down like it was nothing.   
  
Duo: Yes, and that takes us back to flaming... Even when YOU felt the story was horrible, and it couldn't have possibly been worked on for more than only 5 minutes, you can't ever be sure of that. The person may have worked very hard on it...They may think it's the best thing they ever wrote, in fact! What do you think that would do to a person when they found the mstie of their fic that they never knew existed?   
  
Nikki: Yeah, I mean, what would you people do if you came home and your mother had just ripped ALL your manga posters off your wall!! Your hot Gundam shirtless boy posters, and I'd like to add that they were doused in sweat and their pants were unbuttoned too *drool*!! Or, if you're a guy, All your hot shirtless GIRL Gundam cast posters!!! I'm not elaborating on THAT considering I'm of the female species...   
Anyway, what would you do? You mom would be like, "I ripped them off because they were UGLY, and they were very very risqué!!" well, that was HER opinion and she was entitled to it, but she just came in and invaded your space!! And to top it off, she ruined your space while she was invading!! And you'd be in tears, crying and trying to put the posters back together with tape and glue!! "Oh my poor poor posters!!" I know my heart would be just as torn as those posters were if it happened to me!! Same with the fics...someone comes in, reads your story, decides they don't like it, TAKES the story, makes fun of it, posts it back up, and lets everyone read it! Humiliation, plus the feeling of violation...  
  
Noin: *sweatdrop* I just wanna know how you end up making everything so hentai'ish.  
  
Nikki: It's just a talent I have...  
  
Holly: Well, I know I'd certainly hate for someone to yell at me just because they thought my fanfiction sucked...OR if they just didn't like the theme... I'd definitely hate it if someone mstie'd one of them without my permission too.. Thanks a lot.  
  
Nikki: You're welcome! Please, stay on the line and one of our operators will be right with you!  
  
Holly: Okay! Thanks! Buh-byee!   
  
Nikki: Well, that was certainly nice and informative! I'm glad we have such considerate callers with such great questions!  
  
Anonymous caller: Hey, why don't you guys just hurry up and give me a damn Duo plush...in fact, why don't you just give me ALL of them!!  
  
Duo: Hmm...*taps his chin in thought*  
  
Noin: THAT voice sounds familiar...  
  
Nikki: It's...r-RELENA!! She got LOOSE!!!  
  
Anonymous caller: I don't know what in the world you people are talking about!! I-I'm not Relena! *Heero is heard in the background trying to take the phone away from the caller* NO! NO! Give me the phone Heero! I WANT those Duo plushies!! *cries* Heero!! Stop it! Gimmeee the phone!!   
  
*click* *dial tone*   
  
Duo/Noin/Nikki: *sweatdrop* ??!  
  
*Relena and Heero and Wufei all go running past the camera*  
  
Nikki: Oh well...Looks like we've run out of time!  
  
Duo: Well, we hope you've had a nice time watching the show!  
  
Noin: Wait, we still have 2 minutes left...  
  
Nikki: Well, since we have at least 2 minutes...Wanna go steal all the Duo plushies for ourselves while those three run around like complete out-of-character idiots?  
  
Duo: ^_^ Sure!!  
  
Noin: As long as you promise Zechs will never know...  
  
Nikki/Duo: Promise!!  
  
*all go back to the back room to get the plush toys*  
  
^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^  
  
End!   
Well, folks...I've been seeing a few mstie fics, and I just hope the people have been getting permission to do them. I know that most of you are responsible, so those who HAVE got permission, please take no offense. (actually, I'd rather NO one take offense...I'd rather everyone just got along. ^_~)   
About flames? I've not had many flames considering that most of the people on fanfic.net are really sweet, even if they don't like your fic. I just don't like seeing all out flames from meanie flamers... These writers work hard for their end result, and no one should be flamed, even if the story is(in your opinion) 'BAD'. Try to nicely say 'I didn't really like this fic' or, to be even more helpful, try and point out what YOU think might work better... Nice suggestions are always much easier to take than all-out put downs, and they sometimes help the writer!! I know they help me! ^_^ Just remember to review kindly. Hey, no one can blame you for being nice!! ;O) (well, I guess they COULD blame you for being nice...but I know I'd love to take the blame for that kinda thing. ^_~)   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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